Here's this week's mailbag, with co-asnwer person Poo!

Wow dios! This thing goes straight to your mailbox? I sure wish I had a form that peopelc ould fill out to send me a bunch of insults, compliments, and other random :Dishness.

I think the Apple of Enlightenment is some other thing that your slur insanely about in #moonside and such. It's all just a figment of your imagination, and if you get some rest, I'm sure you'll be fine...

~NeoPaula



Yes, right to my mailbox. That's how e-mail works. For someone who understands the 26th dimension, you're really kinda slow. How do you manage to get into the mailbag every week anyway?

~diospadre



Yep, I sure wish I had a form that people could fill out to send me stuff too. That'd be fun. But then all I'd receive was letters saying "Poo, I love you!" or "Poo, you are so hot, you make everyone else look ugly." Anyways, I'd tell you what the Apple of Enlightenment is, but I'm on a tight schedule.

~Poo

You know, there was a big thing about finding an Apple of Enlightenment on EB.Net quite a while ago. Maybe you're doing that again. Or maybe it's just that plot to program our computers to hypnotize us into donating a lot of money to the site again. The Communist Club scared the twinkies out of me when I saw it. It looks hairy scary to me. Has the Syndicate truely returned?

~Hobbes



Well as you can see the only thing that the two apple's share is that they're contest based. No, we're not hax0ring your computer, but keep in mind that the Syndicate is, was, and always will ber watching you.

~diospadre



You're a paranoidal freak. Don't ever call my house again. EVER. Call Tracing works wonders. Oh, and the Syndicate is watching you. Even in the shower.

~Poo

Hi staff, just thought I'd point out something I found at IGN.com, if not noted already. At http://cube.ign.com/news/27023.html , these are the results of a recent poll:

4. What game do you want the most on the [Gamecube]? (4000 replies)

1. New Zelda game
2. New Super Mario game
3. Biohazard 0
4. New Dragon Quest game
5. New Mother game

Just thought I'd drop this in to comment that the EB fans are still showing support.

~Yggdrasi



Yay! Japanese people like Nintendo, I forgot about that. I Heard that with the release of Perfect Dark, Nintendo is enjoying a stunning 26% share of the market in Japan. Actually, that's just N64. I wonder how the GameBoy is doing. Anyway, with Nintendo doing so well over there, and a domestic demand for EarthBound, maybe we will see another installment.

~diospadre



Wow, 5th? I think it should be higher up. What were you EB fans doing while this poll took place??? And why is Zelda first? Nintendo just released Majora's Mask. Was that not enough??? Anyways, if you want my autograph, e-mail me. We'll work something out.

~Poo

I was reading in EGM about a few of the specs of the upcoming Game Boy Advance, noticing that that it would have the capabilities of a SNES and many games from the golden days of Nintendo will be ported..

/me pulls out a huge sign with "Mother on GBC" on it, replaces "Mother" with "EarthBound" and "GBC" to "GBA"

Giving Nintendo it's recent track record of EB games *scorn* it may be a futile attempt, but who knows? might be worth a shot..

~Sir



Ahh yes, the GBA. I must confess that I'm a bit more excited about seeing EarthBound and Mother packaged together as one game for the GB (it is very doable) than I am in seeing EarthBound 64. I guess I like striped shirts better than cowboy hats. *shrugs*

~diospadre



I think they should make more Pokémon games for Game Boy Advance. Cause Pokémon rule. You can never get enough merchandise. After all, gotta catch 'em all!!! (But maybe Nintendo will be nice and release Mother on GB*)

* Not likely

~Poo

You know what I think? I think everyone should be able to get an e-mail address at Starmen.net. I for one would be interested. That is all.

~Tim



About a week ago Xodnizel told me we should give out more E-mail forwarders. Since Xodnizel can kill me just by wishing it, I obliged. Expect to see them soon!

~diospadre



Um, well, we gave out aliases awhile ago, and we're offering POP accounts if you win Funfest. See, that's how I got the e-mail address princepoo@starmen.net. Send me stuff.

~Poo

The Apple of Enlightenment appeared in front of me one day while I was on my hammock and told me that I was the only one that could prevent the apocalypse. Feigning interest, I led it to my house where I promptly made an apple pie with it.

I'm going to do the mailbag after this one. ph33r.

~Rune



I like to heat up apple pie, pour caramel on it, then plop some vanilla ice cream on it. Better than blueberry muffins any day.

~diospadre



Oh, ok. So that's where it went. I was afraid I had lost it and that dios would kill me. By the way, I see Ryoko hiding underneath your hammock. Run! Run! Dive! Dive!

~Poo

No! Not Android 17! NOOOOOOOOO! I am sad. Did you do this dios!? Was it you!?

~Yourmamasmama



Why did I put this letter in? Why? And why do you like #17 better than #18? She was a girl. Krillan liked her better, and Krillan's a freak. That must make you a super-freak, a super-freak. Oh yeah, #19 was awesome (Soon-I-will-have all-of-your-energy!)

~diospadre



No, it wasn't him. It was Android #18. She decided to tell 17 that their mother and father were Dr. Gero. 17 was heart-stricken. Well, anyways, 17 got sucked up on purpose, so he wouldn't have to deal with the pain. :(

~Poo

Can I have a staff job?

~Matrix



Can you fix your modem?

~diospadre



No. Who do you think you are??? The webmaster??? Leave us alone before we call the authorities.

~Poo

Yeah, WTF! oh, i meant what the heck?! Apple of enlightenment? I bet you could make some crazy-type of pie out of it. Which brings me to my point, sorta. What if the Apple of Enlightenment wasn't really an apple but a, dare i say it, PEAR?! Or maybe a starfruit, because they're all funkdified and star-shaped. Anyway, i bet if it was a pear, it'd be like "gwahaha, time to throw them people off with some l33t deception. Like calling myself an apple. Because i like apple and ham pie, with some thyme." So, yeah, wtf is up with that?!

~Godeg



1. We already discussed pie.

2. You're a freak.

~diospadre



Godeg, one day I thought the same thing as you. But then I decided that I wouldn't think that way anymore. So...from that day on, I decided to be evil. Evil. And what the heck is a starfruit? Is it like a Starburst? Cause those taste good. Except for the strawberry ones. Bleh.

~Poo