This week's mailbag topic:

First time troubles with EarthBound, and other letters.

Mailbag is back to normal size (good). Some weird letters this week though (weird). But that's ok! We can be as zany as we want here (within limits). On with the letters (this ends the parenthesis thing I had going on).

Well... I've got a letter that's relivant to the topic.

I mainly had two major hard spots: 1 - Grapefruit falls. This is because my system was so slow that it was running in sub-realtime, so after three minutes, nothing happened.

2 - Dungeon Man. I couldn't figure out how to get him stuck in the trees, because I was looking at the wrong group of trees (smacks self in head with ice cream truck full of rogue ham sandwiches being driven by Mr. T and with Cats backseat driving (Move 'ZIG'. What this foo' talkin' about now?)).

That's my two yen. Happy? well too bad.



Maybe your SNES was moving at relativistic speeds. I personally think it's possible.

- EBounding

Dear Starmen.net,
I want to by stuff from your merchandise and I want to by stuff from your ebay but I have no money. Mom cut off my allowance and she saids I can't have money unless I do ern it. Could I have some money from the starmen.net fund? Here is a list of thngs I need:

- Earthbound Hat

- Earthbound Shoe

- Earthbound Bookbag

- Sega Dreamcast

- Official Starmen.net Bookmark

Thankyou in advance for giving me money.
11-year Timmy Burkenson III



Dear Little Timmy Burkenson III,

Unfortunately, SM.net does not own eBay anymore. Instead we own giovanni (or he owns us. something like that). But what you can do is bug your mom to donate to SM.net. If she does, I (EBounding) will draw a CUSTOMIZED book mark just for you! Here's a picture of what you COULD get if you donate lots of money!!:

- EBounding

Oh, it would have to be fourside it took me forever to beat that city. I never could know what to do (I had borrowed the game from a freind so I didn't have the player's Guide)and the dept. Mook was a serios downer. It took me about two days to get to him and beat him. And after I finally beat him I could't find out what to do before I went to jackie's Cafe I probaly went to ever house or building in the city twice.



Heh, when I first played in Fourside, I saw the teleporting monkey crash into the Cafe. I got scared and thought it was an enemy. It took me forever to realize I had to talk to it.

- EBounding

Why the heck have none of my flukes been in the Fluke section for Months?????????????????????? By the way IF you are inter ested in who the heck i am, and interested in putting my flukes up my name IS:Mr.Saturn!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! so help me God you had better put my flukes up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Whoa there. Your best bet is to re-read the Fluke FAQs and talk to the Flukes' maitainer Mr. Wampaman.

- EBounding

On my first time through the game I had problems with Magicant. I went through 4 flying men at least! there was stuipid Kraken and then the thing that killed me alot: Ness's night mare. Stupid staue. It killed me more than Guygas did.After playing the game again I found him a lot easyer than before. Also why the !@#$%^&*?><=+-_~ do I need that hat the other Ness gives me? You dont need it. Ever.



You don't NEED the hat. It's for nostalgia purposes. Or maybe you never had a hat the entire game.

- EBounding

Goodmorning America(and other smaller, less important countries,

It seems you want us to tell you all about how hard it was.. the first time... well I think it was getting from the nasty pyrimad to the deep darkness.. It took me 3WEEKS to get through all that and then when i finally got there i just had a golly fun old time getting through the swamp.. ughh. anywayz i guess thats all, bye,bye,
happily Written by,
Mr.SaTuRN



Did you ever find the Hawk Eye? It makes things easier...I found out the hard way when I didn't use it...

- EBounding

MOONSIDE IS THE WORK OF THE DEVIL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!DIE MOONSIDE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE! I'm going to nuke Moonside as soon as I get a nuke that can get sent into eb without destroying the game.



I take it you thought Moonside was hard?...I love letters where I can use the first sentence as a topic.

- EBounding

By far, that was the Mondo Mole. Man, he was so hard (Before I realized Paralysis worked) that I skipped him until after I got to Fourside. Then, I remembered he was still there, and I beat him in a snap. Before I skipped him, I was killed over and over. Even Diamond Dog was easier than Mondo Mole to me.

Also, I found the smily little pile blocking the way to Grapefruit falls extremely tough. That was LONG ago and I have no idea why he was hard (Way too easy now) but I do remember stocking up on toothbrushes. Don't ask me why. Then I found out they don't always work and got all mad. I think I had to return the game to Blockbuster's!



I always wondered why the Hippie carried around brushes. I thought they were all "Natural" can junk like that? Icky.

- EBounding

I always have trouble getting to the Trillionage Sprout. Every single time I play. I always get into battles with 2 Mushrooms, 2 Sprouts, and one of those Cactus looking guys, and i lose about 20 PP from both Ness and Paula, and at least one of my characters get Mushroomized, so i have to go back to Saturn Valley. When I finally get strong enough that this doesn't happen, the Trillionage Sprout is horribly easy.



The mushrooms are the worse. It's a good anti-drug message though.

- EBounding

I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!!

What is that deep voice saying when you choose a character's name at the start of the game?

Boogeskotch? Butterscotch?

It's driving me crazy!!!!

....BTW, what're the chances of me finding one of those Pizza Man air freshners on Ebay or elsewhere? :o

Ness, Mach Pizza Boy



You certaintly are new. :) He's saying "Ok de suka". Go through the articles and read Tomato's article that uncovered this mystery. And I don't think the Pizza Air Freshner is being auction. But the auctions are constantly updated, so you'll see it there if it does go up.

- EBounding