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Drugs, Alcohol and Violence... [In EB0] - by NinjaBoyNeo

Drugs, Alcohol and Violence... [In EB0]

This is my first attempt at an article, mainly because I've never had any good ideas to get down on paper... and the fact I owe PappyCat one for helping me with a project.


Well, I started a new game of EarthBound Zero quite a while ago and eventually got to Magicant, well you see... it's funny because I got an item called 'The Big Bag' once again and then it hit me like a sack of bricks... what the HECK!?

The Big Bag is an item that can give out about 30 or so Magic Herbs... yup. Now I'm thinking, haha... you use weed to get health back [as a joke], but this is no joke! I then recall that a slang-term for a bag of marijuana is call a 'big bag', or 'bag'. Heh, before you go all loco on me and say "NBN! DRUGS ARE BAD! WHY ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT THIS!" let me explain...

Well, obviously there is a drug reference in the game, could this have been just a mistake or were the translators just putting in a small joke? I guess we'll never really know.

In Magicant you can also take 'Red Weeds', put them in a fountain's water and have them transform into 'Magic Herbs' - I mean come on, that's just crazy... but then again all of Magicant is a pinkish cloud land with potato sack head people and glass floored palaces.

Heh heh, which then leads me to another drug reference in the game - the infamous 'Crow' enemy, who shall be forever dubbed Smokey The [Smokin'] Crow*. I assume Nintendo thought the idea of a smoking crow would cause kids to smoke cigarettes, just like good ol' Joe Camel [who ironically I grew up with, and his ads/products all over the TV/magazines and never did I once think of taking up smoking, AT ALL.] who was eventually canned by the anti-smoking critics.

I'm not being PRO-CIGARETTES FOR ALL, but isn't that a little stupid to completely destroy an artist's work for a 'possible' reason that isn't even confirmed about smoking? I mean, the smoking crow enemy is just a joke, and every time I see him or his clay model I can't help but get a little chuckle out of it. I suppose it all started with some mother saying "Cartoon characters aren't allowed to smoke! This is outrageous! It will somehow teach my kids to smoke... I must act quick! TO THE COMPLAINT-CAVE!"

Another thing is the bullet holes edited out of the Gang Zombie's body, I mean come ON - are they expecting kids that will suddenly shoot other kids because it looks cool? I honestly don't think so. And to top that off, when you take this away, how is a kid supposed to kill a zombie now? Perhaps look at it? Or maybe talk his way out of the approaching zombie? No way! He's gotta gun that sucker down and send him back to the earth he once rose from! Hehe.

Also, on a side note I would like to include these following games "Golgo 13: Top Secret Episode" and "Little Nemo: The Dream Master" [both for Nintendo] and their aspect on smoking...

In Little Nemo, there was a Gorilla character who you could hitch a ride with, Nintendo edited out the cigar from this brute's mouth for no reason... although they thought it was perfectly fine just to leave the stogey in his mouth for the manual art! Also, the first character you meet in the game - 'Flip' doesn't have his trademark cigar from the comic series.

Next is Golgo 13, there is a pack of cigarettes just laying on the ground around the beginning of Chapter 2 and once Duke Togo walks up to them, he smokes the pack [a hilarious animation I might add.] and ALSO recovers all of his health from doing so... HELLO NINTENDO, IS SOMETHING WRONG WITH YOU!? I guess Nintendo thinks it's okay for adults in video games to smoke up, but it's horrible for a cartoon character to have any form of nicotine stick in his/her mouth.

It's also a little weird that the whole 'Want me to buy you a drink?' scene is still in EB0, I would expect Nintendo to just drop the NPC's entire programmed event if you wanted to underage drink. Although it's still kept in there... this is most likely because there is a consequence shown if you choose to take a drink. You actually get arrested and end up in jail if you choose to take a drink, but if you say no then the NPC snaps at you saying something to the extent of "What's the matter, are you afraid of the cops?"

Not to mention, the classic "Super Mario Bros." game... Mario would eat Magic Mushrooms, grow bigger and then get the ability to bash bricks with his head! Are the drugs just numbing Mario, giving him hullicinations AND thinking he is getting stronger!? This is Nintendo's own mascot here!

So overall, I would just like to say that I am incredibly confused at the whole topic at hand, do we need to have the smoking animals drop dead after smoking up? Or perhaps it's A-okay to smoke a pack of cigarettes and get your health restored... Hey, wait!! Using drugs in general to get health back is good! - sometimes it's okay, and sometimes it's not? What gives? Make up your bloody minds Nintendo!


*Note: Smokey The Smokin' Crow only has a cigarette in Mother, not EarthBound Zero. I just wanted to clear that up incase you got confused during my article.

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